Welcome to Vandelay Industries:
Seinfeld Soundbites
Click here for: Miscellaneous Characters
              George Costanza as Art Vandelay:

     Vandelay Industries.wav (114kB)

(phone rings)
- Kramer: Yallo, what Delay Industries?!
- Elaine: nooh...!
- George: (from bathroom) VANDELAY, SAY
        VANDELAY!!
- Kramer: Nah, you're way way way off...! (what?!)
- George: (from bathroom) VANDELAY,  SAY VANDEL ... 
        (george runs into the livingroom and falls)...
        Vandelay Industries, ...
- Kramer: No problem, ... no problem!
Cosmo Kramer

Got room in the car for the pig man, 2 seater.mp3
(42kB)

I am Cosmo Kramer, The Assman.mp3
(30kB)

Erica, the phone sex woman; blew your mind.mp3
(71kB)

Gennice (understudy Bette Midler) not suitable for Broadway.mp3
(136kB)

Kramer fighting and driving with a mugger in a Bus.mp3 (63kB)

Fighting over Bra-less woman and O'Henry candybar.mp3
(103kB)

Kramer trying to crack George's ATM code.mp3
(167kB)

The colliding world theory.mp3
(53kB)

The Contest - Count me in on this.mp3
(25kB)

Kramer breaking up with his girlfriend, contribution.wav
(24kB)

I am Cosmo, Jerry. I am Cosmo Kramer!.wav
(33kB)

I'll see ya later buddy.wav
(9kB)

I'm dangerous Jerry, I'm very very dangerous!.wav
(7kB)

Jerry is a rabid anti-dentite!! They do have their own schools!!.mp3
(124kB)

So what's up, Diggity Dog?.wav
(17kB)

The Dominicans will come after El Presidente.mp3
(73kB)

When they pull that needle out, I let the expletives fly.wav
(34kB)

Kramer knows all about fake breasts.mp3
(25kB)

The supermarket doesn't have decent piece of fruit.mp3
(39kB)

Giddy up.mp3
(8kB)

Ooh, GOD help us!!.wav
(13kB)

Kramer wants to play golf between the dunes.mp3
(43kB)

Hand model: Kramer discusses George's hands.mp3 (23kB)

Who wants to have some fun (...)?!.mp3
(46kB)

Hoochie mama.wav
(3kB)

These were real hooters.mp3
(6kB)

The spit: I screamed out, I'm hit.wav
(30kB)

Jerry and Elaine are in love with each other.mp3
(23kB)

The Little Jerry (rooster) is doing more with Jerry's name, than Jerry ever will.mp3
(56kB)

Who's gonna turn down a Junior Mint, delicious.mp3 (30kB)

The Chicken Roaster: Kramer in bed eating chicken when the Lights go out. Kenny?!.mp3
(38kB)

The Chicken Roaster: Kramer at his window with a sign saying "come back Kenny".mp3
(30kB)

The Chicken Roaster: Kramer begging Jerry to leave the roasters alone. Big Problem.mp3
(32kB)

I'm Cosmo Kramer, the Assman!wav
(47kB)

Oohh-yesss.wav (17kB)

You gotta listen to the little man.mp3 (38kB)

Kramer explaines the whole concept of Marriage to Jerry!!!.mp3
(214kB)

The Merv Griffin show: Scandals & Animals!.mp3
(136kB)

Kramer punched Mickey Mantle, hit me.mp3
(74kB)

Jerry wants the telephone number of Isabel. Look in the mirror.mp3
(50kB)

Kramer threw a banana peel to a monkey.mp3
(89kB)

Kramer has to apologises for hitting the monkey.mp3
(58kB)

Kramer's mother has got to help George. Matron.wav
(262kB)

There is a naked woman across the street.wav
(5kB)

Oohh-yeaaahhh!!!.wav
(8kB)

The anguished "oink" of Pig-man cries out 4 help.mp3 (14kB)

I'm out there Jerry, and I'm lllovin' every minute of it!!!.mp3
(14kB)

I just saw a pig man! A pig man!.wav (37kB)

When I don't like you, you've got problems.wav
(40kB)

Multiply the recipe, Kramer gets confused.mp3 (30kB)

Kramer advertises Hennigans (scotch).mp3
(55kB)

It stinks, can you smell that? You stink!.mp3
(14kB)

George needs a surgery. "My name is Bob"!.mp3
(65kB)

The hot tub is like Sweden, Sweeeeden.mp3 (30kB)

Jerry is Switzerland.mp3
(15kB)

Ja ja ja, just tell it.wav
(32kB)

A bra is for ladies. Meet, the bro.mp3
(9kB)

You're thin, late 30s, single. So are you!.wav
(18kB)

All the big companies write off everything.mp3 (64kB)

Yaaaoouuwww!!!.wav
(19kB)




Jerry Seinfeld

All right!!!.wav (8kB)

That's a big move - Matzoh Ball.wav 41(kB)

I know the chunky that left these chunkies,
Newman!!!.wav
(18kB)

Kramer never listen to Jerry anymore. Crazy time.mp3 (63kB)

Favourite explorers, Magellan. DeSoto?!.mp3 (79kB)

Jerry's confessing. Father: offends you as a Jewish person?!.mp3 (64kB)

Are we finished?! Done!.wav (11kB)

Fungicide. I mean what could she have?.wav (20kB)

God bless you. "You're soo good looking''.mp3 (20kB)

Hello Jerry. Hello Newman.wav (28kB)

Hello Newman. Hello Jerry.wav (11kB)

Hellooooooohh.mp3 (6kB)

Kramer's face is hideous.mp3 (92kB)

Slapping hands is the lowest form of male primate ritual - Puddy: High five.mp3 (97kB)

The Voice: Holaaaa, helloooohh.mp3 (18kB)

Newman is my sworn enemy. He lives down the hall from my home.mp3 (31kB)

I'm not sure and and and correct me if I'm wrong but I think I see ... a nipple!.wav (71kB)

This is horrible! I care!.mp3 (40kB)

Ever tell you how much I love you.mp3 (39kB)

(Phone) Hi Sophie, it's me. The Tractor
story.mp3
(114kB)

So long, Jackass!!.mp3 (4kB)

I get jiggy with it!.mp3 (5kB)

Knowing you is like going out in the jungle.mp3 (20kB)

The Kiss Hello: I don't see the point to it.mp3 (25kB)

The Kiss Hello: How about an intercourse
hello?!.mp3
(44kB)

La la laaaahhh.mp3 (8kB)

I'm going to hire you as my latex salesman?!.wav (57kB)

The Contest: Men have to do it, part of Lifestyle.mp3 (15kB)

Make-up sex is the best feature of a
relationship.wav
(22kB)

Master of your domain. Queen of the castle.wav (22kB)

Mulva? ... Gipple? ... Loleola? ... Oh, Deloris!!!.mp3 (98kB)

Jerry suppress his emotions - What's that, a new bit?.mp3 (68kB)

We're like children. We're not men. Pathetic!.mp3 (39kB)

We're not gay! Not that there's anything wrong with that!.wav (33kB)

I chose not to run.mp3 (15kB)

95% of the population is undateable - Alcohol.wav (64kB)

(
phone) Would you be interested in a subscription to the New York Times.mp3 (24kB)

You're gonna be the first pirate. I don't wanna be a pirate.mp3 (32kB)

Newman, open the door!! Pleasant surprise.wav (36kB)

Jerry is hooked up to a Polygraph - Melrose Place.mp3 (57kB)

I made a reservation, do you have my reservation? But the reservation keeps the car here. That's why you have the reservation! (...).mp3 (100kB)

Risk: It's a game of world domination being played by two guys who can barely run their own lives.mp3 (21kB)

Uniforms Yankees shrunk. That's a shame.mp3 (63kB)

The Spit Theory: Allow me to reconstruct this.mp3 (44kB)

The Spit Theory: (...) That is one magic luggie.mp3 (51kB)

You stink. Thanks for the tickets though.mp3 (69kB)

Jerry is stressed, he's become Kramer.mp3 (36kB)

We discover yet another talent. Posing as a girlfriend for homosexuals.mp3 (14kB)

The Deal Theory: this (friendship) vs. that (sex).wav (83kB)

Kramer if I killed somebody would you turn me in? (...)
I thought I DID!.mp3
(84kB)

George needs to be observed in Vienna at University level to get better.mp3 (135kB)

Stand up (performing): Men want Women!!! These are the best ideas we’ve had so far.wav (122kB)

Tim Whatley making Jewish jokes. Schtickle of flouride.mp3 (101kB)

What's the worst thing that could happen?.mp3 (44kB)
George Costanza

Ah-haahhhh!!!.wav (17kB)

Temperature in Florida, 79, almost 80.mp3 (24kB)

Answering machine George: Believe it or not, George, isn't at home (...).mp3
(237kb)

Pretend to be an architect.wav
(34kB)

I am the Bad boy, never been the bad boy. The bad employee, son, friend, ..., tipper!!.mp3
(58kB)

He is beboppin and scattin, and I am losing it.wav
(11kB)

You had to have the Big Salad!!.mp3
(44kB)

Break up through the phone? One motion! Right off!.wav
(21kB)

Buzzer - come on up.mp3
(16kB)

Can't park in a garage, it is like going to a prostitute.mp3
(74kB)

Mr. Heyman - Can't stand ya
(38kB)

My mother caught me during....(you know) .mp3
(117kB)

I am caught in my own web of lies.wav
(33kB)

Block of cheese, the size of a car battery!.wav
(15kB)

Checkmate - we should not see each other anymore.mp3
(86kB)

The advantage of dating a prisoner, no competition and pop-in.mp3
(82kB)

Jerry slept with Elaine, Now you listen to me. I want details and I want them right now!.mp3
(140kB)

Different cupsizes, D is the biggest.wav
(41kB)

You double dipped the chip. You dipped the chip. You took a bite, ... and you dipped again.wav
(62kB)

The ego: friend/sex arrangement between Jerry and Elaine.mp3
(68kB)

Never felt confident below the equator.mp3
(97kB)

Kramer goes to a fantasy camp. His whole life is a fantasy camp!.mp3
(49kB)

Funny guy!!.wav
(10kB)

You can stuff your sorries in a sack mister.wav
(23kB)

Lets get nuts!!!.wav
(6kB)

Get down on your knees and thank god that (...).mp3
(24kB)

George goes nuts: Japanese guys had sake in the hot tub!!!, Uncle Leo?! JERRY!!!.mp3
(46kB)

Do you wanna have sex right now?!! Let's go! C'mon, let's go baby!!! C'mon!.mp3 (29kB)

Helloooo.mp3
(13kB)

Holding it in is very bad for the kidneys (pool).mp3
(65kB)

Are you cying from Home alone?! The Old man got to me... Oh, shut up!.mp3
(49kB)

Hoochie mama.wav
(3kB)

Break up: You lied toe me George!... I got hand!... And you'll gonna need it.mp3
(67kB)

You are killing Independent George!!.mp3
(7kB)

IQ-test: People think I am smart, but I am not smart. Who think you are smart?!.mp3
(25kB)

The jerk store called, and they are runnin outta u!!!.mp3
(11kB)

Khhaaaaaaaaaan!!!!.wav
(14kB)

What kind of person are you; only successful.wav
(17kB)

Jerry = Kramer since he moved in Kramers appartment.mp3
(33kB)

Little respect for the Lord of the Idiots.mp3
(84kB)

George in love with Tony the Mimbo.mp3
(76kB)

The Marine Biologist - George walks into the water.mp3
(67kB)

The Marine Biologist - the sea was angry that day my friends, like an old man trying to send back soup in a deli! (...) A hole in one, huh?!.mp3
(218kB)

The Marine Biologist - George tells to Diane he is not a Marine Biologist.mp3
(74kB)

The Race - George pretends he doesn't know Jerry.mp3
(98kB)

The Race - George is becoming bald.mp3
(99kB)

Driven woman to lesbianism, never to mental institution.mp3
(13kB)

No no no no no.wav
(28kB)

Hey it is George, got nothing to say.wav
(29kB)

George in discussion with an old man. Live is too short to waste on you.mp3 (56kB)

Feel like my old self again, (...) It is a pleasure.mp3
(20kB)

The Opposite Theory: My life is the complete opposite of everything I want it to be (...).mp3
(131kB)

The Opposite - My name is George (...), I am Victoria.mp3
(63kB)

The Opposite - Who are u, I am the opposite (...).mp3
(52kB)

Food and sex are the 2 passions.mp3
(31kB)

Am I talking to you Pinhead?!!!.wav
(33kB)

Are you crazy, this is like discovering plutonium by accident!!!.mp3
(26kB)

I was in the pooooool, I was in the poooool !!!.wav
(40kB)

Every time I think I am out, they pull me back in!!.wav
(42kB)

No one has accomplished the Roommate Switch.mp3
(39kB)

Salsa is the number one condiment in America. Salsa, salsa, salsa.mp3
(121kB)

Serenity now!!!!!.wav
(7kB)

Sons of bitches!!.wav
(13kB)

The Opposite - Job applicant at the New York Yankees. Hire this man!!.mp3 (110kB)

The Andrea Doria - Life stories of George.mp3
(131kB)

I can sense the slightest human suffering.mp3
(22kB)

I proclaim this the Summer of george.wav
(9kB)

The Opposite - We're trying to watch the movie!!! (... tough).mp3
(56kB)

I am unemployed and live with my parents.wav (34kB)

George is gettin upset!!.wav
(15kB)

George is wasting his life. No job, money, woman, prospects (...). Daily News.mp3
(128kB)

Mr. Hayman gives George a Wedgie.mp3
(70kB)

What the hell is going on here?!!!.wav
(14kB)

The colliding worlds theory, killing independent George.mp3
(92kB)

Yada yada yada.wav
(6kB)




Elaine Benes

Maybe the Dingo ate your baby! The dingo ate your baby!.mp3 (20kB)

Are you gonna sleep with me or what?! I'm too tired to even vomit at the thought..mp3 (23kB)

Elaine hates The English Patient, go to hell !!.mp3 (22kB)

Elaine has faked: It was all an act?! What about the breathing, the panting, the moaning, the screaming? Fake, fake, fake, fake!.mp3 (29kB)

A bird ran into my giant freak-head.mp3 (19kB)

Get out.mp3
(9kB)

Admitting a man is handsome (...), it does not help.mp3 (39kB)

Helloooohh.mp3 (8kB)

What am I, a hooker?!.wav (13kB)

I am become George, it is true, I am George.mp3 (44kB)

Elaine, Jerry and George saying: These pretzels are making me thirsty.mp3 (55kB)

He recycled this gift, he is a regifter.mp3 (12kB)

Jerry!!!, shut uuuupp!.mp3 (5kB)

Stunned by soup?!.mp3 (5kB)

She is a virgin, not like spotting a toupee.mp3 (22kB)

Yada yada yada.mp3 (3kB)

Yada yada sex, I mentioned the bisk.mp3 (43kB)
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jerry seinfeld, george costanza, cosmo kramer, elaine benes, newman, mr steinbrenner, soupnazi, frank and estelle costanza, soundbites, sound bites, MP3, wav, pictures, sounds
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vandelay industries
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jerry seinfeld, george costanza, cosmo kramer, elaine benes, newman, mr steinbrenner, soupnazi, frank and estelle costanza, soundbites, sound bites, MP3, wav, pictures, sounds
Click here for Miscellaneous Characters:
Newman, Mr. Steinbrenner, Frank & Estelle Costanza, Jackie Chiles and others ...
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Last updated: 11-06-2005